Ringing in a Balanced New Year
January 2002

• Review. Sit down with yourself or your partner to look at your life objectively. Identify where balance is currently a problem and brainstorm some solutions.
• Examine. What are your goals? Are you getting what you want and need out of your career? Family life? Leisure time? Make a 'lifestyle wish list', then work out what you need to get there.
• Act. Start with small goals that can lead to bigger ones. (One night course every few months can lead to a degree you've always wanted. Reading one book on nutrition today can lead to better health in six months. Searching for a new babysitter now can lead to more time for yourself or your relationship every month.)
• Plan. Plan. Plan. Before you go to bed, plan your morning's routine (breakfast, wardrobe, keys, weather check, children's needs). Before you leave work, plan your next workday's priorities. Before you go shopping, plan your weekly meals. Remember, people don't plan to fail, they fail to plan!
• Relax. Build in time for yourself, your friends and your family. Set out to mindfully keep stress from building up. Adopt good habits and new attitudes: breathe deeply, eat well and exercise, don't sweat the small stuff, keep an open mind, give unto others, be proud of your accomplishments, make every day count.

Make Your New Year's Resolutions Work for You!
The type of resolution we set for ourselves is a good indication of where we want to see changes in our lives. But too often, we're enthusiastic about making that change in the first few weeks of a new year, then the resolve fades away. If you're serious about wanting to make positive changes, you can be successful. Here are some guidelines that may help:

• Be realistic. Before you set your goals, think about whether they are really achievable, and what small steps can be put into place to make them more achievable. Be clear about what you want to gain out of sticking to the resolution: Is it a permanent lifestyle change? A temporary modification? A new attitude or approach?
• Be flexible. Rather than giving up on your resolution and then being disappointed with yourself, consider making some adjustments that will help you modify your resolution and stick to it. For example, consider another method of quitting smoking if cold turkey's not working for you; arrange to go to the gym with a friend instead of alone; start your quest again February 1 after more planning.
• Prepare for roadblocks. Think hard about what may get in your way of success, then plan on how you'll overcome those challenges. You may not be able to anticipate all the roadblocks, so also be prepared to note them as they come up and give them some thought at a later time. Don't feel you need to respond immediately and successfully to all roadblocks. Take it slowly. Change is a process.
• Get help. There is such a great deal of information and support available today that it just doesn't make sense to try to 'go it alone'. Pick up a book, check out a website, sign up for a course, join a support group, make an appointment for counselling, ask a friend to help. Your chances of success are increased dramatically when you seek out the kind of help you're most comfortable with. When we connect with others, or acquire knowledge through others, we're strengthened, and so is our resolve.
• Listen. Listen to your body, your thoughts, your instincts, your dreams. In a fast-paced world, it's easy to lose touch with ourselves and our motivations. Take the time to experience how you're feeling, how you're reacting to people, places and things. If it's painful to ALTer your ways or to give something up, what does the pain mean for you individually? How can it help you know yourself better? Very often, those who have emerged through a difficult time (overcoming an addiction, changing old behaviors) not only feel great pride and a sense of accomplishment, but feel the experience has made them more confident, secure and content.
• Keep it Secret or Share? Decide what works best for you. Is it better to tell everyone about the resolutions you're planning to make? Or will it be easier for you to keep it personal? If you choose not to share your plans with others, it doesn't mean you have to do it alone - it just means you prefer to get the support you need from outside your circle. Some people find keeping it to themselves a strengthening experience. Others feel sharing their goals helps reinforce them. Give it some thought to help plan for your personal success.

Need help in balancing your work and family demands? WS Family Matters™ can help. Call your EAP at 1-800-387-4765 for service in English or 1-800-361-5676 for service in French.